Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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