She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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