So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Randomize
