It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
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it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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