they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
