problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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