Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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