your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
