I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
