So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
