do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Let's paint friendship bongs
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I have post one night stand depression
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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