And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize