On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize