I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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