how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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