doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
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Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
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No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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