Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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