everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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