I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
