the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
