...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
