so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Girls should come with a carfax report
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
