I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
