The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize