Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
