The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
