Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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