My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Randomize
