u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
