this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
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Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
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if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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