sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
