Pregnant stripper...not hot.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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