Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
