i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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