The brown eye won't let me do that either.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
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Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
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A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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