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You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
where does the pee come out of this thing
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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