we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
