on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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