I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
they call him Oral-B. enough said
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
