Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
