I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
