Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
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he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
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Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize