should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize