I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
