Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
