i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Randomize
