How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
