Ambien. No doubt about it.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize