He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
