i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
